box

i am knocking on the glass wall of my box. i am waving at you. i am screaming at you. you turned your back to me. i want you to look at me. i want you to listen to me. i want you to pay attention to me. i knock. i wave. i scream. the track comes, it picks me up in my glass box. it drives me for a while. it lets go of my box.

merged

your world used to be so perfectly divided. there was your current life with your family, your work projects, a few social pals, a nightly tv hour. there was your young life with boys and girls - soon to be senior citizens - who you used to call your friends. there were the one night stands, the unanswered loves, the cigarettes, the clubs, the books, the shots. you used to feel so at ease sharing events of your college life with people at work. you used to feel so relieved being able to tell the truth about your high schools relationships to a friend you met in your 30s. you used to feel so entertained making up stories of your romantic encounters for anyone who listened. you felt so secure separated from that life by years and continents. it was so until the social networking sites came in and merged it all together, bringing chaos into your daily life. suddenly, all these one night encounters materialize into faces for your significant other. suddenly, your late 30s friend befriends a friend of your early 20s. suddenly, you are not sure what you are going to see on your screen each evening. suddenly, you are having a panic attack every time you turn your computer on.
did you really think it through before you opened that facebook account?

exhibit

i open a glass jar. i remove all the stale particles that have been sitting in there for ages. i clean the jar with soap and water until the glass is crystal clear. i climb into the jar. i close the lid. look at me, point at me – i am an exhibit, i am unique.

discontinued

fuck. finally, few months back i found a replacement for my old lipstick that has been discontinued for quite some time. i used to order it from who knows where until it disappeared from the market forever. so, after a long search, i found another one that i loved. and, of course, i go to get the new one, only to find out that sephora has discontinued the brand. i can still buy it, but not at sephora. well, let me tell you, it will not be too long before the brand is dead, when sephora decides they are not making revenue on it. there is a pattern in my life – my beloved facial mask – discontinued, my favorite toothpaste – terminated, so are numerous mascaras, foundations, and various other cosmetic items. don’t get me started on the food. why do my favorite yogurts always have to go? i feel, every product i try and don’t like ends up on the shelves for years in full glory, and everything i like gets kicked out as soon as i feel comfortable with my new product. i obviously don’t have a taste for anything that can hold on the market. well, at least my new lipstick is coming, just extra $6 for shipping, it will be here soon.

regina spektor

the members of the orchestra have left the stage. the performing girl stopped playing her piano. she stopped playing her synthesizer. she stopped playing her guitar. she stopped playing piano with her left hand while hitting a chair with a drumstick with her right hand. she is just standing in the middle of the stage at the radio city, and singing. no musical instruments anymore, voice only. she sounds so much better in concert. this shy audience appreciative nicely weird girl somehow transformed this large commercial venue into something else – just a large dark room filled with a beautiful voice, and with happy people. it was a great concert. i was very impressed.