it is a warm bright night in the late spring in a crowed city. young eccentrically dressed cool looking people are everywhere. we are holding hands. we are crossing a street on a red light. a cab makes a sudden turn almost hitting us. you pull your hand out of mine. you run forward. i step back. i wait for the green light. i cross the street by myself. i put my hand into yours on the other side of the crosswalk. we keep walking. i tell you i love you. this is the first time i tell you that.