nannies

i am a neurotic obsessed mother. my children live on a very strict schedule. their activities are timed, carefully planned, and thought about in great detail. i am thinking about returning to work, we are looking for a nanny. right now i am finishing breastfeeding one baby, my husband is changing the other one. a candidate was supposed to show up about an hour ago, and still did not. doorbell rings. my father, who is helping out this evening, opens the door. i think i am late, am i? - the lady by the door asks. i think so, - papa answers. she blushes somewhat embarrassed. oh well, i guess i am going to go then, - she replies after slight hesitation. ok, - says papa and closes the door.

we keep looking. we see all kinds of nannies – caribbean, spanish, american, greek, russian, hungarian, old, young, experienced and expensive, inexperienced and cheap. we like this romanian girl, we hire her. she is supposed to show up the next day at 9am, she calls us at 8:50 to say that she is sick, not sure if she should come, and she is stuck in traffic. we fire her.

we keep looking. we really like this polish girl who has the experience and lives near by. but she is so expensive, we don’t think we can afford her. we like this caribbean girl, she seems really good, but she is even more expensive, there is no point for me to go back to work, paying this kind of salary to a nanny.

we keep looking. one russian candidate tells me i should stay home with my children. another russian lady starts crying about the death of her daughter’s husband. we kind of like this other russian woman, she seems ok, but she can’t say a word in english, and she says way too many words in russian.

we keep looking. a russian lady shows up – she is not young, but she seems pretty good, intelligent, has the experience we need, the salary requirements are appropriate, she speaks basic english. that’s great. we hire her, i arrange my return to work, and i start training her. she calls and says she can’t show up because her uncle in russia died. the next day she calls to say that actually it is her daughter that died and not her uncle. this day is my birthday and the day before i have to return to work. oh shit.. i think i am going to have a heart attack now. we fire her.

we keep looking. i work from home. my husband takes some time off work. we have no nanny. miraculously my cousin finds an ok russian nanny with good experience and references. we hire her. it seems to be working out. she is not bad, hardworking, likes kids, a little weird, but hey, who is not. she starts giving me attitude. i feel bad, maybe i micromanage and control her too much. i try to be easier on her. she gives me attitude. i try explaining the way things are to her. she gives me attitude. we fire her.

we keep looking. i don’t want russian speaking nannies anymore. we find a nice colombian girl from london two blocks away from us - educated, polite, with experience and references in the uk. she is willing to work for the salary we’re offering. we have to apply for her work visa, we have to pay a lot of money to the agency that represents her. we go for it. we want the best for our children. there is a storm in our neighborhood on day one of her employment. she can’t come to work because there is a hole in her roof. she gets a bleeding ulcer on day five of her employment. she is crying because she is breaking up with her boyfriend. she is back together with the boyfriend but she has to stay home with him because he brakes his leg. his grandpa dies, she gotta go to the funeral. she has so many problems, she is barely showing up to work. she has to text so much, she does not have time to care for the children. she damages a disk in her back, she can’t lift the children. we fire her.

we keep looking. we are looking mainly at russian women, they prove to show up. i don’t have the tolerance talking to all these ladies. my mother is prescreening them for me. one lady seems not bad. we hire her.

to be continued?